Hi Akshay
First, congratulations on the attempt. I feel we can refine the theme a little more deeply.
The presenting issue is clear: he loves someone and wants to get married, but the family is not agreeing. Now, instead of stopping there, we need to understand how this whole scenario makes him feel. Why does he want to marry her? I know this might sound like an crazy question—“because he loves her”—but as therapists, it’s important for us to explore what this love really means to him.
For example, he may say:
- She understands me well- indicates a deep need for understanding.
- She cares for me - shows a longing for nurturance.
- She is the only one who can make me happy - here you get a key insight: perhaps love, care, or happiness is missing in his life.
We don’t jump to conclusions, but we keep asking gently, so that the theme refines itself through his own words. Remember, the key aspect in theme finalization is: what exactly about the situation is bothering the client most deeply? Like in that story where Ekalavya says he sees only the eye of the bird—in our work, it’s only the client and his pain that matters.
Now, regarding spontaneous emergence: since the client is kinesthetic, keep bringing focus to sensations—use words like feel, sense, experience. “Feel” is the key to his door. Also, psycho educate him beforehand that emergence can happen. Even if it does, he can simply keep his eyes closed, stay in the recliner, and share with you.
When that happens, you anchor yourself, take a slow deep breath, and affirm to him that it’s absolutely okay. A bit of guided breathing, gentle coaching, and further relaxation can bring him back into the engram.
If he says, “I don’t feel or see anything,” you can invite him softly: “What if that event had something to communicate to you, what could it be?” But here you must be very observant of his body language and ensure he remains in trance while responding. Hope this helps 