Client Particulars
Name: Stef
Age: 62 Years
Gender: F
Hypnotizability score:8/10
Eye roll score: 1/4
VAK: 2/6/5
Dominant Sense: Kinesthetic
Second Dominant Preference: Audio
Pain Level Before: 7/10
Pain Level After: 0/10
Session 1 (PLR Stages 1-6)
Aug 28th: 10 am to 1 pm
Client History:
- Stef is a married 62-year-old homemaker residing in Gurgaon. She was an English teacher before retiring to support her husband. She has two married children, a son and a daughter.
- Stef is the oldest sibling of three. She has a younger brother who lives in London and a younger sister who lives in Gurgaon. She comes from a traditional Brahmin family with a modern urban outlook.
- Her early childhood was lived on frugal means, a loving father and a highly strict and disciplinarian mother. She bore the brunt of her strict parenting being the oldest sibling and had to endure pressure to do well, be nice and be perfect in all her pursuits.
- Stef experienced the stress of having to parent her younger siblings when her mother lost functional capability as she was Schizophrenic patient.
- Stef has had a happy marriage to a loving husband, but their family business shut down in the past year, drowning the family into debt, legal cases, shame and no future to look at. This has severely impacted her husband and her son, and they have gone into deep depression and a reclusive life.
- Stef has lived the burden of an older sibling, feeling accountable for everyone and carrying the burden of every one’s expectation. This has carried on in her adult life too and now in the midst of a family crisis, she feels alone and unable to bear the overwhelming burden of being responsible for everyone.
- Stef feels she could never live free, for herself and has always been dragged into solving issues of others. This has had an impact on her physiological and psychological health. She has had a series of health issues to deal with.
Session 2:
Aug 28th 2 p.m. to 6 p.m.
PLR Stages 7-11
Theme finalized with Stef: Freeing herself of Burden of Expectations
- The session began with me playing 528 Hz Om Mantra Chanting to relax Stef and wean off the cognitive fatigue of the long first session. Being a devout Hindu, Om chanting worked wonders in putting her into a relaxed mode in no time.
- Then we spent time finalizing the theme for the PLRT and she felt focusing on the unrealistic burden of expectations that she has been carrying on her shoulders since her childhood would reduce her stress and trauma and set her free to live and grow as a person.
- Stef nicely settled down into a recliner and asked for a thin blanket to cover her legs. She reported feeling relaxed and ready for the session.
- After praying I started induction with Dave Elman followed by progressive relaxation and ball of fire, Staircase and Garden. Stef responded well to the induction process and was soon in fairly deep trance.
- ** Happy Childhood memories**: Stef recounted happy childhood memories of a loving father and a happy middle-class educated Brahmin family. She grew up on great family values and her father in particular showered unconditional love on her. Stef became emotional remembering her childhood and in the context of her difficult life now wanted her childhood to extend forever. She kept saying how wonderful a time it was and how happy she was. She wished she could leave all behind and be a child again. She missed her father (Babuji) a lot and felt she could not do much for that wonderful and kind soul. Stef reported being a bright student, good looking and being proficient with art, music, household chores, sports and academics.
- From this place of relaxed and happy memories, I progressed her gently back to her conscious, present state. She was smiling, reminiscing the wonderful childhood memories that had come to live during the induction and visualization sessions. I let Stef go home with these pleasant feelings to continue her third session the following morning.
Session 3:
29th Aug 10 a.m. to 1.30 p.m.
- After welcome, recap, prayers and settling down into the recliner, I followed up with another long round of Dave Elman induction and deep progressive relaxation. This was intended to be a long and deep session to induce deep trance in Stef and for her to gain access to memories, connection and associated stigmas during her childhood and beyond.
- She regressed to early childhood recalling the difficult moments with her mother, being scolded, shouted and screamed and made to bear responsibility for everything that went wrong with her siblings or in the house. Her mother often forgot she was a child and could not be expected to carry the load of an adult. Stef developed a coping mechanism of avoidance; she would spend as much time as possible away from her mother and started developing resentment towards her. She also had to bear the anguish of her sister being showered with love when all she did was to be nice to her mother. Stef developed resentment towards her sister as well. She remained neutral towards her brother who minded his own business. Stef reported feeling unloved, not cared for or feeling safe in her family of origin home. She felt a constant expectation from her mother to be the best, like a flawless machine. No one saw her loneliness, frustration and helplessness of being the oldest sibling and forced to progress to adulthood much ahead of time. There came a time when the memories were too painful and traumatic for Steff as she was crying profusely as she recounted this difficult phase of her life. I brought her back to the Garden to come and relax before regressing her again beyond her childhood.
- After relaxation this time I progressed her to her deity’s temple. I could see her face relaxing and beaming with joy and her body beginning to relax deep into regression. I asked her to open one of the doors inside the temple that leads to her past life. When she opened the door, the following conversation transpired between us:
T= Therapist, S= Stef the client
T: What do you see and experience Stef
S: I see a huge garden
T: Is there anyone else there
S: No, I am the only one who lives here as I am the gardener
T: Are you a man or a woman
S: Man
T: How old are you?
S: 70+ and have always been looking after this garden. It is a lot of hard work as I have to manage everything from sowing, cutting, cleaning, manuring to chopping and pruning. I am tired of this job and wish someone takes this job away from me. My family has conveniently abandoned me and left me with this huge responsibility.
T: How do feel all by yourself at the garden, does your family visit you?
S: They come whenever they need fruits or flowers or when there is a festival and a picnic to celebrate. Even that feels like a lot of work to me. I feel lonely, unloved and am old now. I need someone to take the burden off me, and this is too overwhelming
At this point Stef was sobbing and crying, and I could see her chest swell and she was feeling overwhelmed with strong emotions of burden, loneliness, pressure and carrying the burden of responsibilities which her family should have shared equally, Sensing the emotional situation I progressed Steff to her deathbed and asked her again what she saw:
T: What do you see Stef:
S: I am very old on my death bed and my near and dear one are all around me. I am about to die, and they are all sobbing. I can now see my soul rising and I can see the scene below, leaving everyone behind. I am now ascending into the sky.
T: What do you see Stef:
S: I see bright white light and few figurines.
T: Who are they?
S: Some learned people I guess like Masters
T: Could you pay your respects to the Masters and do the same from my side as well. They have come to receive you and help you.
T: Do you want to ask the Masters the thing that has been bothering you all your life/
S: After a long pause said she asked the Masters why she was held responsible always and how can she relieve herself of the burden.
S: The master replied that this feeling resides in me only as has stemmed from a place of me not being able to say no for things that I am not responsible. And while I complain of the burden, I never take the courageous step of seeking help, articulating my difficulties as I am afraid of offended my near and dear ones. This one emotional habit and cycle has spiralled into countless situation in life when I carry the burden of everyone, as a sibling, as a wife, as a mother and as a friend among my circle of friends.
T: What are the masters advising you should do?
S: Masters are smiling and blessing me with the courage and understanding to do my part with compassion and devotion and gently decline what others should be doing, This assertive stance vis-avis the avoidance route I was taking to manage my relationships is the root cause of a majority of issues I am facing. I should start doing it gently with low significance issues first, slowly graduating to major decisions. I should also trust others that they will do their best to accomplish the tasks they are responsible for and should not second guess their capabilities, intentions and skills. Thus, I should not constantly ruminate about their inabilities and being drawn again into a cycle of action.
S: Masters are advising I should instead slow down, trust the Universe and my diety and do my best. This will divert my attention to living fully and realise my true potential.
T: I asked how does she feel after receiving this divine guidance?
S: She reported feeling safe, peaceful and resolved in her head as to what was causing all this angst in her lives. She could also recognize the pattern across lives when she felt the burden of responsibility and the unreasonable expectations associated with it.
T: I asked Stef if she wanted to stay, move to another life or felt resolved enough to go back.
S: Stef reported she was feeling great and happy this pain has been resolved and would like to go back.
4. I progressed Stef to the Temple and after paying respects to her Deity and then onwards to the Garden.
5. Ego-strengthening: As she rested in the Garden I began the ego-strengthening narrative of the insight she received from the Masters and how she was now the master of her destiny. Stef reported feeling confident, at peace and for the first time feeling free and unburdened, The catharsis and the subsequent revelation from the Masters helped break the cycle of burden and helplessness in her mind. She felt ready to go back to mainstream life to face the world again with a different lens.
6. Post this Stef progressed to the staircase and gently back to her conscious self. I offered her some water and a bit of time breathing deep and processing what had happened. She was now completely out of the long trance.
7. Integration: After a sufficient gap after coming out of the trance, Stef and I discussed what this means to her, She reported understanding the cause of her suffering and forgave her mother, sibling, husband and children as she saw the solution was well withing her. She said she will now choose to operate differently, taking the burden off her shoulders and try her level best to live a life of freedom, love and carefree abundance. She will trust others to do their best and will be guided by the Masters and the will of the Universe.
8. Therapist’s note: Therapeutically Stef suffered from a delusional belief that she had to carry the burden of her siblings, husband and children all her life. This belief system was ruining her happiness, peace of mind and quality of life. By clearly identifying the root cause of her trouble in the cognitive state and the regressing to early childhood and past life, she could see a pattern of acquiescing to please others. Once she realized this in a trance state, the underlying life programmes in her subconscious rerecorded her new belief system. The catharsis. deep trance, temple visit and divine advice the Masters gave, helped solidify the belief system deep into her subconscious. This is likely to play out now in her conscious world as she boldly makes new informed choices. This was reinforced as well when she came out of the trance to the conscious state. Hence the problem and its resolution have been dealt now in the conscious-subconscious-superconscious-subconscious-conscious realm to seal this new reality in Stef’s behavior and the choices she makes going forward.
As a therapist I will check-on Stef after a few weeks to see if she is coping well and whether there are any other behavioral comorbidities to be addressed as well.
What Happens When You Practice Om?