Vitals: Dev [Name changed], M, 63YO, H: 7/10, Eye: 1/4 VAK: 3/9/3
Theme: Sleep (To sleep better)
History:
Dev comes from a lower middle-class family, being the oldest child among his parents and two siblings, a brother and a sister. His childhood was simple, marked by a distant relationship with his father, while he was particularly close to his mother and sister. After losing his father at a young age, Dev had to forgo his education and began working at 17, becoming the sole earner for his family.
Living in a joint family, he supported his siblings through their education, helped them get married, and married himself. Although he is now financially better off as a businessman, he carries the heavy burden of being the only earning member, which brings him constant worries about financial stability and his children’s future.
Despite responsibilities, Dev lived a carefree life. However, in his later years, he became more serious. He’s very religious and prays & meditates daily. Despite his successes, he feels regret for being unjust to his own family while trying to support his brother’s family. When reflecting on his life, he was surprised to realize how much he had not considered these feelings since taking charge of the household after his father’s death.
Session 1
Began the session with a prayer to the Gods & Masters
Induction - Dave Elman, Progressive Relaxation
Visualization - Light, Staircase, Garden
T: This is what the therapist said.
C: This is what the client said.
Began with Happy Memories and In-Utero. However, the client did not experience anything here. He seemed very stressed, his forehead was creasing, so I asked him why he was stressed as I could see his forehead creasing. I did stress management. I asked him to keep breathing deeply from his abdomen a few times. And asked him to relax his forehead, face, neck, and shoulders.
Age Regression
T: When I count from 5 to 1, go back to a significant memory from this lifetime, when you first experienced loneliness and fear. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
T: Do you feel, hear or see anything?
C: IMR (No)
T: It’s okay. Relax your forehead, face, neck and shoulders. Keep breathing deeply from your abdomen. You are safe.
Now, when I count from 3 to 1, go back to a significant memory, when you first felt sadness, fear, and loneliness. 3, 2, 1.
Whenever you are ready, you can describe what you feel, hear or see.
What comes to your awareness?
C: IMR (No)
T: It’s okay. Your subconscious is very powerful. It remembers everything. And by diving deep into your subconscious, you can revisit and relive all those memories. When I count from 3 to 1, go back to a significant memory when you first felt sadness, loneliness, or fear.
3, 2, 1. You will remember everything.
Can you see, hear or feel anything?
C: IMR (Yes)
T: Can you describe it to me.
C: I remember when I was a child, around 4 or 5 years old, I went to play down with my neighbor. I ended up getting into a fight and hit someone with a stone, causing him to bleed. Out of fear, I ran home and looked down from the bathroom window. His mother came to fight and to hit me. She said I’ll cut your boy. Let him come down, I will break his head. Maa calmed them down and gave her some money for the treatment. Even after that, I was so scared that for a few days, I jumped over the back gate of our building to go to school. That’s what I remembered.
T: Okay.
C: I remember going to Lalbaug with Maa. And I also recall visiting my grandmother in the hospital once.
T: Okay. Why did you go to the hospital to meet your grandmother?
C: She had eye surgery for cataract.
T: (Intensified the emotions to catapult the client into the past using affect bridge. However, the client couldn’t imagine or experience the bridge.)
C: No.
T: It’s okay. You can rest in the garden.
(After sometime) Maybe now, you can imagine a narrow road through this garden.
Can you find this narrow road?
C: No
T: Imagine, look for it.
C: I can only see a white light, and nothing else, since so long.
T: White light?
C: That’s it
T: How does it feel seeing the white light?
C: It feels nice and relaxing.
C: Sometimes, darkness comes in it, but I just push it away.
T: Very good. You can continue to relax in this light that you see.
You can relax here. It will take away all your stress, all your worries, and all your troubles.
T: Now, when I count from 3 to 1, imagine a narrow road through this garden. 3, 2, 1.
Can you find this road?
C: No
T: It’s okay. Would you like to return?
C: Yes
After this, I emerged him.
After the session, we discussed his experience. He mentioned that when I talked about taking steps downwards (on staircase), he felt himself going down the steps and saw something like a quicksand. He also saw a skull, which he kicked aside, and after that, all he could see was lights. He was trying to imagine a garden, and even saw one from his past, but thought it should be something which is absolutely divine. I told him that you can imagine any kind of garden. And then he could only see lights, just like when he meditates. He usually sees even brown spots inside the white light, which today he didn’t see. Today, there was only light.
At the extreme end, he could see absolute darkness for once.
I told him to not strain too much to remember, assuring him that the memories would come to him on their own, but he still kept doing that. His forehead would keep creasing. However when I mentioned, he said I was relaxed only. He’s someone who usually meditates. He mentioned that whenever he does that, usually different thoughts come in his mind. But today, there were no other thoughts, and all he could see was white light.
We decided to meet next day.
Session 2
Began the session with a prayer to the Gods & Masters.
Induction - Dave Elman, Progressive Relaxation
Visualization - Light, Staircase, Garden
Dev could imagine a garden today. After relaxing the client for a while in the garden, we proceeded further.
T: Maybe now you can find a way out to this garden leading to a road. Let me know when you find this road.
Relax your forehead, neck and shoulder.
C: (IMR)
T: Very good. Start walking on this road, and this road may lead you to a mountain. You can start climbing up on this mountain.
C: (IMR)
T: It’s completely safe for you to walk upward. The mountain is not very steep and thus you can climb it easily and comfortably, and as you climb up, you can imagine the surrounding. Maybe some beautiful trees, grass. Maybe you can feel the soft breeze on your cheeks, the freshness around or maybe you can hear the soothing sound of soft rustling of leaves, the birds chirping.
As I count from 5 to 1, allow yourself to reach at the top of the mountain cliff.
It is completely safe here. 5, 4, take long, deep breaths, 3, 2, 1.
You have reached the top of the mountain cliff. You are safe here. You may imagine a railing around this cliff to keep you safer, having enough space for you to stand comfortably.
C: (IMR)
T: Now you can imagine a beautiful ocean beyond this cliff. You may look around, maybe you can imagine some beautiful mountain ranges around, maybe a boat in the ocean and maybe you can even imagine how does the horizon looks like where the ocean and the sky meets. You can choose it to be anytime of the day.
C: (IMR)
T: Standing on this cliff, you can imagine two empty boxes. A bigger box behind you and a smaller box in front of you.
C: (IMR)
T: Open the bigger box that’s behind you. And in a moment I am gonna count from 3 to 1, on the count of one allow yourself to pick up all the unpleasant and hurtful memories that happened within last one month. Take your time, pick up all those memories one by one, you can put a heavy metal frame around those memories and put it in the bigger box that is behind you. Take as much time as you need, Let me know whenever we can move forward. (EMDR)
C: (IMR)
T: Now, when I count from 3 to 1, on the count of one allow yourself to pick up all the hurtful, painful, unpleasant, discomforting, disturbing memories that happened within last three months. Take your time, pick up all those memories one by one, you can put a heavy metal frame around those memories and put it in the bigger box that is behind you. Take as much time as you need, Let me know whenever we can move forward. (EMDR)
C: Mmhmm
T: Shall we proceed further?
C: I’m not finding any memories to put in the box. Didn’t find them before, and didn’t find them now.
T: It’s okay, do not worry. It’ll come slowly.
Now, when I count from 3 to 1, on the count of one allow yourself to pick up all the hurtful, painful, unpleasant, discomforting, disturbing memories that happened within last six months. Take your time, pick up all those memories one by one, you can put a heavy metal frame around those memories and put it in the bigger box that is behind you. Take as much time as you need, Let me know whenever we can move forward. (EMDR)
C: I’m not finding anything.
T: It’s okay. Keep breathing deeply from your abdomen. (EMDR)
Now, when I count from 3 to 1, on the count of one allow yourself to pick up all the hurtful, painful, unpleasant, discomforting, disturbing memories that happened within last two years. (EMDR)
You need to take all the memories that cause you pain and distress and put them into a big box. Any memory that troubles or hurts you should be placed there.
Take your time, pick up all those memories one by one, you can put a heavy metal frame around those memories and put it in the bigger box that is behind you. Take as much time as you need, Let me know whenever we can move forward.
C: (IMR)
T: Now, when I count from 3 to 1, on the count of one allow yourself to pick up all the hurtful, painful, unpleasant, discomforting, disturbing memories that happened within last five years. Take your time, pick up all those memories one by one, you can put a heavy metal frame around those memories and put it in the bigger box that is behind you. Take as much time as you need, Let me know whenever we can move forward. (EMDR)
Relax your forehead, neck and shoulder. Take deep, long breaths.
C: (IMR)
T: (I repeated the above process for ten years, 20 years, and beyond uptil his childhood. He started taking really long pauses now. He started picking up all the hurtful, painful, unpleasant, discomforting, disturbing memories that happened with him and put them in the bigger box.)
T: Were you able to put the hurtful, unpleasant, disturbing memories into the box?
C: Yes, whatever I could remember.
T: Very good. Now you can close this bigger box. And turn around to the smaller box that is in front of you. Open that smaller box. In a moment I am gonna count from 3-1, on the count of one allow yourself to become aware of any future worries, anxiety, dilemmas, concerns, or any tension that impacts you. 3, 2,1.
Take your time, gradually think of everything that makes you worry about future, put a heavy metal frame around that concern and keep it into the smaller box that is in front of you. And let me know whenever we can move ahead. (EMDR)
C: (IMR)
T: Now you can close that smaller box as well and if you wish you can lock both the boxes. As I count from 5-1, you can push both the boxes off the cliff into the ocean. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
Let me know when you have pushed those boxes into the ocean.
C: (IMR)
T: were you able to push both the boxes?
C: (IMR)
T: Very good.
EMDR. You may now allow yourself to feel the peace and relief. How does it feels like to let go of all the past hurtful, unpleasant, discomforting, disturbing memories and how does it feels like to let go of all the future worries, to let go of all the burden that you were carrying on your shoulder. Enjoy the surrounding while you are standing on this cliff, feel the soft wind flowing, maybe the birds chirping, beautiful ocean.
Be there for a moment, and let me know whenever we can move ahead.
C: (IMR)
T: As I count from 1 to 5, on the count of 5 allow yourself to return back to the garden. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.
T: Are you back in the garden?
C: (IMR)
T: Good. You may relax in the garden and continue to heal yourself. This garden is filled with divine light.
After taking IMR, I emerged him.
After the session, we discussed his experience. He mentioned that initially he wasn’t remembering anything to put in the box, but then it started to come to him. And once he began remembering, he recalled a lot. He put all negative aspects of his life and any regrets in the big box. And in the small box, he placed all his future worries, and then tossed the boxes into the sea.
He concluded that usually we don’t realise our problems and worries but somehow it gets stored in the subconscious. And with our (cliff) meditation, it picks all the problems from the subconscious, and it teaches you to throw away all your problems and future worries and live in the present. Because of all these worries, you’re not able to live your life. Whatever will happen, let it happen. Whatever is meant to happen, it’ll happen. And enjoy your present.
He also realised that when he meditates, he has a lot of thoughts coming, and he often finds answers to his problems through this process.
He mentioned that after today’s session, he felt light. Remembering the negative memories didn’t make him sad; instead, he removed those thoughts, threw them away, and felt much lighter afterward. I encouraged him to allow himself to feel all the emotions, saying it’s perfectly okay to do so. He said usually I don’t share things, I keep it in my heart, but then when you asked me to put it in a box and throw it away, it helped him to lighten his burden.
He asked if we’ll do more sessions, I said yes. He was doubtful that he’ll be able to go into past. I told him that he just needs to focus on my voice, and let his subconscious guide him. He shared that at times he visits places for the first time, but has a strong feeling that he’s been there before.
Session 3
Began the session with a prayer to the Gods & Masters.
Induction - Dave Elman, Progressive Relaxation
Visualization - Light, Staircase, Garden
T: Shall we go back to your childhood and pick out a memory. It maybe something, you have not thought about, or remembered, for a long long time. As you stay in this deeply relaxed, calm, and peaceful state, let your deepest mind pick out a happy childhood memory. If you wish, you can float above the scene and watch from a distance. When I count from 3 to 1, pick out a happy memory from your childhood.
Let me know what comes to your awareness. You can take as long as you like.
C: Hmm
T: Did you feel, see or hear anything?
C: Hmm
T: Can you describe it to me?
C: We kids are playing hide and seek in the old house, under the bed.
T: And what else is happening? How does it feel?
C: It feels fine.
T: Very good. Now let us go back even earlier, to a younger age, as an infant or a toddler or a small child and pick out another memory using all of our senses, and again remember it vividly using all of your senses… sight, sound, taste, touch, smell.
When I count from 3 to 1, pick out another happy memory from your childhood…Be there! Experience it, remember you can always float above it and if uncomfortable just come back into the garden.
Do not worry whether it is imagination or fantasy or an actual memory. This is all coming from your mind, it is all important, it’s all from you, and it may be a mixture of all of these. This is for the experience… let yourself experience… allow yourself to remember. Stay in deep state and re-experience these memories…3,2,1.
You can take as long as you like and let me know what you experience.
C: Hmm
T: What did you feel, hear, or see?
C: Maa is feeding milk to a little child.
T: Are you able to recognize the child, who is it?
C: I’m imagining, maybe it’s me, I don’t know, I’m not able to understand.
T: Hmm. It’s okay to feel a bit confused about the memory. Just allow yourself to be in that moment without trying to figure it all out. Remember, this is a safe space.
Now, as you relax in the garden, focus on your breathing. Inhale deeply and exhale slowly. Let any tension melt away. Relax your forehead, neck, shoulders.
Now, look around this garden. You may find a bridge.
(After sometime) Did you find this bridge?
C: IMR (No)
T: It’s okay. Keep breathing deeply from your abdomen. Relax your forehead, neck and shoulders.
You may walk a little in this garden. And maybe you can find a narrow road, leading through this garden.
C: Hmm
T: Start walking on this road. This road is filled with trees and flowers on both sides. Feel the grass beneath your feet. Feel the gentle breeze. Keep walking on this road. And as you reach the end of the road, you will find an ancient temple. When you reach the end of the road, you will find yourself standing near the staircase of the temple.
Do you see the temple, or can you feel it?
C: Hmm
T: Very good. You are standing at the bottom of the temple stairs. Now, as you begin to ascend the stairs, take your time and feel each step beneath your feet. As you reach the top, you find yourself standing in a beautiful large corridor with many doors. There is a large, magnificent door right in front of you.
Did you find this door?
C: Hmm
T: Very good. Now open this door, and trust whatever you feel, hear or see.
T: In the center of the temple, you may find a beautiful statue of a deity. Take a look and see which deity’s statue it is.
C: It’s not a statue; it’s a Shivling.
T: Very good. You can take blessings. You can ask any questions if you want, and trust whatever answer you receive.
C: Hmm
T: Now, in this temple, you will find many doors. Choose the door where you will find answers to your questions. The door where you will receive healing. Select that door and go inside.
(After a while) Did you find the door?
C: No
T: There are many doors. Look around the temple. You will see different staircases leading to different doors. Choose the door where you will find answers to your questions. Where you will find a solution for your sleep. Select the door where you will find solutions for your problems.
You may take as long as you like and let me know when you find it.
C: Hmm
T: Are you in front of the door?
C: Hmm
T: Now open this door and go inside.
Let me know what you experience?
C: I see smoke.
T: How does it feel?
C: Okay.
T: Now, when I count from 3 to 1, you will be able to see beyond the smoke. 3, 2, 1.
What comes to your awareness?
C: Nothing.
T: When I count from 1 to 3, you can come out of that door. 1, 2, 3.
T: And now, when I count from 3 to 1, go to another door where you will find answers to your questions and solutions to your troubles. 3, 2, 1.
Take your time. Relax your forehead, neck, and shoulders.
(After some time) Did you find this door?
C: No.
T: It’s okay. When I count from 1 to 3, you can come to the center of the temple. 1, 2, 3.
C: IMR
T: Now, when I count from 1 to 5, you may come back to the garden. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.
C: IMR
T: In this garden, you can relax and rejuvenate. This garden is filled with beautiful and divine light which heals you.
T: Now, imagine that you are entering a very large glass pyramid. This pyramid is very big and very beautiful.
Can you visualize it?
C: No.
T: It’s okay. Keep breathing deeply from your abdomen. Relax your neck, shoulders and your body.
As I count from 3 to 1, you will be in a very large glass pyramid. 3, 2, 1. Imagine that it’s beautiful one.
(After a long pause) Can you visualize it?
C: No.
T: It’s okay. You can continue to relax in this garden.
Inhale deeply and exhale slowly. Relax your forehead, neck and shoulders.
Your subconscious mind is very powerful. It remembers everything.
Remember, to recall something easily, don’t try too hard, or your subconscious is simply focused on the thought, the act of remembering. Instead, ask your subconscious what the answer to your query is, and relax and allow it to pop into your mind without even trying.
T: Now, after resting in the garden, look around. Outside the garden, maybe you can find a small boat in the water. Through this boat, we will be able to go back to the time when your problem started, to find out why you are unable to sleep. When I count from 3 to 1, allow yourself to find a boat in the water. 3, 2, 1.
(After some time) Did you find the boat?
C: No
T: It’s okay. Are you ready to come back?
C: Hmm
After this, I emerged the client.
Integration:
Dev could see a beautiful garden today, filled with flowers, one he recognized from the past. When I asked him to imagine a temple, he saw the Bhimashankar temple and the Shivling. When I asked him to visualize a door inside the temple, he saw a door within doors like in the movies you see Lord Vishu’s door opening. After that, it was all dark, and he could see dark clouds or smoke.
I realized that he tries, but he tries too hard to remember. I feel that he’s too conscious even while in trance. I discussed again that he needs to let himself be and allow things to come to him organically. He mentioned that during the temple meditation, he was trying too hard at first, but then he let himself relax, which took him to the Bhimashankar temple. The same thing happened with the temple doors. He also said that sometimes he feels too sleepy during the sessions, but he doesn’t actually sleep because he needs to stay awake for them.
He told me that since last 2 days, he’s been sleeping slightly better. Earlier he used to be worried about not getting proper sleep.
I advised him to stop saying that he can’t sleep, which he often does, because the subconscious takes that as a command and acts accordingly.
He shared his thoughts on yesterday’s session and how much he learned from the meditation (cliff). He pointed out that it’s not about avoiding future planning, but more about not letting it cause stress. He also feels that the therapy is progressing positively and that he experienced a real sense of relaxation.
Session 4 (After three days)
Began the session with a prayer to the Gods & Masters
Induction - Dave Elman, Progressive Relaxation
Visualization - Light, Staircase, Garden
T: When I count from 3 to 1, go back to a happy memory from your childhood. You can take as much time as you want.
(After a long pause, my client was snoring. I didn’t mind it though. I would happily wait for him to wake up from his nap)
(After another long pause) Can you see, or feel anything?
C: Hmm
T: Can you describe it to me.
C: I saw playing with marbles with S, and playing bat ball in school.
T: Who is S?
C: My friend’s older sister. We are playing marbles in the lane.
T: Very good. How do you feel?
C: It feels fine.
T: Very good. Now you may rest in this garden for as long as you like. You are completely safe here. Take long, deep breaths. Relax your forehead, neck, shoulders, and body.
Look around the garden, you may find a bridge. You can take as much time as you want.
C: I can see the bridge from Madadheera movie. There’s no bridge in the garden.
T: Okay. Now when I count from 3 to 1, start walking on this bridge. This bridge will take you back in time, further back, and further back. So far back where you need to go, beyond time and space. And where you will find the answers to your questions, and find relief from whatever is troubling you. Keep walking on this bridge. 3, 2, 1.
(After some time) Do you see, hear, or feel anything?
C: No.
T: It’s okay. You can just relax here. Take long, deep breaths. Relax your forehead, neck, and shoulders.
Now, let your mind go deeper. It’s okay if you find anything, and it’s okay even if you don’t find anything.
Take long, deep breaths. Relax your forehead, neck, and shoulders. You are completely safe. And your mind is very powerful. It can go very deep. (EMDR)
Just feel the relaxation and calm.
In a moment, I am going to count from 5 to 1, just let your mind relax and go deeper, and deeper. 5, 4, 3, and deeper, and deeper, 2, 1. Take as much time as you want, and you can let me know when you find something.
(After a pause) Take long, deep breaths. Can you feel, hear or see anything?
C: No
T: No worries. Experience this deep relaxation and just relax. Your subconscious mind is very powerful, and it remembers everything.
T: Alright. Now, when I count from 1 to 5, you may come back to the garden. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.
Are you back in the garden?
C: Hmm.
T: You can take some time to relax here and continue your healing process. This is a very safe place. You are completely secure.
T: Now, imagine that you are entering a magnificent glass pyramid. And this pyramid is very beautiful.
Can you imagine yourself in a glass pyramid?
C: No
T: No problem. Just walk a little in the garden, on that beautiful path where there are flowers and plants. Feel the beauty of the flowers. Feel the cool, soft breeze as you walk, and you will see a magnificent glass pyramid. The glass pyramid is very large and splendid. The sunlight is hitting it, scattering rainbow colours.
Can you imagine the glass pyramid?
C: No
T: It’s okay. Imagine there is a tunnel in front of you. This tunnel is filled with light that is safe and is protecting you. As you walk through the tunnel, you feel a sense of peace. And when I count from 3 to 1, allow your subconscious to go back in time.
3, you are walking through this tunnel filled with light, 2, you are about to arrive, 1. At the end of this tunnel, you will see a door. You need to open this door.
(After some time) Are you in front of the door?
C: No. I can see all irrelevant things today.
T: What do you see? Please describe it.
C: (Dev mentioned that he could see a lot of pointless things, various places from his childhood, but again said that he was seeing all pointless things today.)
T: No worries. Now, when I count from 1 to 3, you will return to the garden. 1, 2, 3.
I let him relax in the garden and then emerged him.
Integration:
Dev mentioned that the visuals he saw were mostly from when he was around 9-10 years old. He kept seeing different scenes, but they weren’t in continuity. He said these were the memories that he had forgotten but saw them today. He also saw a train from the olden days. He said that when I mentioned tunnel, he saw Vaishnodevi Mata’s temple tunnel (gufa). He also said that today he almost fell asleep at least three times, and he realized it himself and then woke up.
We decided that we can continue with more sessions after a break, in order for it to be more effective.
Pain Assessment:
Before Session: 9/10
After Session: 5/10