Red or Blue Button

Questions and Answers
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Today I encountered a beautiful life enlightening question from my son: he said this question has been a viral and I am going to ask you. I said ‘Go on’.

You have a red and a blue button in front of you. If you press Red- you will live. If you press blue- you may or may not. less than half a population press blue, you will live. if more than half a population press blue, still only half a population lives. within that half the population you might be there or not. Now are you going to press blue or red…

I immediately answered blue. My son looked at me with such a disapproved look. Really mommy, I expected better kinda look. I asked what is the problem?

He asked me, why did you choose blue? I said I will get a 50% chance to live. When you have 100% chance to live why didn’t you choose blue. I said Red button, people might die. He said the question didn’t have that statement. Initially my ego raised up, I am driving, so I didn’t pay attention to the question properly.

But the reality is we are so hardwired in our brain with these thoughts.

Red is selfish. If you choose yourself over others, somebody will hurt. It is better to be living among half the population, rather than living alone. Be a mediocre, rather than be trendsetter.

How many of my subconscious beliefs within this simple questions-

Being selfish is bad. Red is bad. if I have to live, somebody have to die. if I choose the middle path, then somehow I will be spared from the negative outlook I have on my self.

I didn’t I think even for a second that every one can live. We say infinite possibility, manifestation. But if so many hardwires are there within myself, how am I going to help my clients….

I want all of you to think about this question….when the client have limited beliefs about themselves, this question will open their eyes, I strongly believe….What are your thoughts?

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Thought pondering question! I feel you Devi, I would press the blue button without hesitation. It’s deeply embedded in us Indians, specially women. We are programmed like this, No software update can de-bug this. Indian philosophy often teaches us to put others first, serve with love, and sacrifice for family. And honestly, women have turned this into an Olympic-level skill for generations. Feed everyone first, worry about yourself later, remember every birthday, solve every crisis. But somewhere between seva and self-sacrifice, many women forget that they are human beings too. Even Bhagavad Gita speaks about balance, awareness, and dharma, not disappearing completely in the name of duty. Taking care of yourself is not selfish; it’s simply making sure the person holding the whole house together also gets to breathe, laugh, and enjoy life a little. So I think from heart not from the brain. I’m programmed like that.

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Not only Indian females Harmeet, but also American females( my son’s teacher), but many males will also choose blue…those who choose red are shortsighted selfish individuals…what i want to focus is think about what doesn’t exist as a possibility..finding a solution with current reality how will it serve…your solution inherently have to be impossible to make it possible

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Yes! It’s hard to think ‘out of the box’! Few things are so deeply rooted that our mind doesn’t even think of other possibilities and it seems like unreal or impossible at first, but can be achievable. It’s hard to let go of certain beliefs which are not serving its purpose but we cling to it, because we haven’t explored or even thought about other possibilities. The paradox is that sometimes a solution has to sound impossible first, in order to become possible later. Innovation, healing, philosophy, even personal growth all begin when someone dares to think beyond the accepted boundaries of reality instead of simply adjusting to them.

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But why not red? Thanks Vikrant

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Really, I feel the same, @hc2101 Harmeet and @devithiagarajan. We Indian women are different in all aspects. And the upbringing that we’re getting as girls—society kept different norms, but still we r happy to go with it peacefully :heart:

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As a therapist, we always need cooperation to grow, and at the same time our client needs our cooperation to handle their tough situations :face_without_mouth:

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यह सहयोग (cooperation) बनाम स्वार्थ (selfishness) का प्रश्न है, which is tricky, but agar hum cooperation, it will be working for me and definitely a wonderful thing as well. fantastic :clap: :clap: :clap::clap: :clap::clap::clap: :clap::clap::clap:

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@vikrantsharma.sap because we are raised to believe that sacrificing ourselves/our needs for others is the selfless thing. We don’t live for ourselves, we live to serve others like family kids etc. We don’t want to come as selfish for choosing ourselves over others. That’s our grooming, we are GOOD people. We don’t enjoy, take time off or do anything for ourselves. It’s the त्याग भावना !!we have been seeing it in all aspects of our lives from movies to real life and we are conditioned to selfless living. So unconsciously I would pick BLUE button, because I’m programmed like that. And I’m a Sikh woman and our religion is based on sewa :folded_hands:t2::folded_hands:t2:

So I didn’t use logic, instead I used my heart without realizing that if everyone picks RED button, we all live :grinning_face::+1:

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This really made me pause and reflect deeply. I honestly feel many of us would react the same way because somewhere we have been conditioned to believe that choosing ourselves automatically means taking away from someone else.

What touched me most was your awareness of your own subconscious beliefs and your openness in sharing it so honestly. That itself is such a beautiful learning. Sometimes these simple questions reveal layers within us that years of overthinking cannot.

I also loved the point that we rarely think from the space of “everyone can survive” or “there can be enough for all.” It shows how deeply fear, guilt, and scarcity are wired into us without us even realizing it.

Thank you so much for sharing such a thought provoking reflection. It truly makes one reflect upon.:folded_hands:

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So truly explained. I guess we are conditioned to believe that if one person wins, someone else must lose. Over time, this mindset has become so deeply wired into us that we stop questioning it. But the moment we begin to imagine cooperation, and shared well-being as real possibilities, it quietly changes the way we see ourselves, others, and the world around us.

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After going through the question 2 or three times, I chose “Red” and read all the discussions wondering what I could have missed :slight_smile:
In retrospect, I chose Red because it was simpler … I hope the world gets simpler, good discussion @devithiagarajan @hc2101 @priyanka.bhu12 @nidhicl
coincidently @vikrantsharma.sap also chose the red one… can we hypothesise that men have simpler minds :slight_smile:

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Yes of course! Women are way too emotional :heart: their mind is also like their handbags :grinning_face: they have everything for everyone, all taken care of!

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Yes my dear @devithiagarajan we are selfish .. the day v accept that we conquer ourselves.. learning from @venu and @Neha ma and @amarantos platform I have tried to mould myself into a better person and help people and yes agreed when u live for others or when u put urself in their situation then their is self realization.. kuddos to ur son.. god bless​:folded_hands:t2:

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spot on! else this creation wouldn’t have reached this far :slight_smile:
Here is to the Shakti :ok_hand: :man_bowing:

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Read this line a while ago, so true-

शक्तिहीना शिवः शवः

Without Shakti, even Shiv Is powerless :folded_hands:t2:

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Such a powerful reflection Devi… :heart:
Not the answer, but the honesty with which you observed your own subconscious conditioning.
Most people never even pause to notice these hidden beliefs running silently underneath their choices.

And honestly, I feel many of us would have chosen blue for the same reason…. somewhere deep within, we are conditioned to believe that choosing ourselves completely is selfish.
But your son’s innocent perspective beautifully broke that pattern.
Children sometimes see life without the emotional filters we adults carry for years.

This question is so simple on the surface, yet it opens doors to guilt, fear, self-worth, survival, sacrifice and collective consciousness all at once.

Beautifully shared… and such an insightful tool for therapists too. :folded_hands:

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@ Harmeet :heart:

This line “between seva and self-sacrifice, many women forget that they are human beings too" is soooo real and deeply relatable.

And yes, somewhere many of us are emotionally programmed to choose from the heart first, even before logic arrives. But maybe true awareness begins when we can hold both compassion for others and compassion for ourselves together, without guilt.:folded_hands:

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Beautifully expressed Devi​:ok_hand:

About “thinking beyond the existing possibilities.” Most of us are conditioned to choose only from the options presented to us, rarely questioning the frame of the question itself.

And maybe that is where true consciousness begins…. when the mind stops reacting from fear, conditioning, survival or morality alone and starts asking “Is there a possibility where no one has to lose?”

At the same time, I also feel people choosing red may not always be selfish…sometimes they may simply be choosing certainty from a place of responsibility, instinct or may be fear.

Human psychology is so layered.

That’s what made this discussion so profound for me…. one simple question opening so many hidden doors within the mind. :folded_hands:

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Beautifull @Harmeet especially the line

“a solution has to sound impossible first, in order to become possible later”

So true…

I feel healing also begins exactly there….. the moment we stop accepting inherited beliefs as the only reality and allow ourselves to even imagine a different possibility.

Such a deep and thought-provoking perspective. :folded_hands:

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